It’s not very often this happens, but when it does it completely throws me. One of my indulgences is a strong rich coffee in the morning, ideally with a sweet biscuit obviously if I wasn’t trying to lose weight. I was having a conversation with someone the other day how I could live on biscuits and sandwiches.

I tend to make cakes because they are quicker and easier, but biscuits are my real passion it all started when I use to work in an old people’s home and everyone would stop at 10 o clocks for coffee and biscuits with a natter. In fact it’s where my coffee obsession started.

I can’t believe it all started with very sweet milky Nescafe. And has ended up at dark strong espresso, the only thing is I still like a dash of hot milk in it and that’s ‘hot milk’ not this froth they try to palm you off with.

So this morning, with no drinkable coffee in the house (I cannot longer stomach Nescafe or even its posh counterpart gold blend) and after already have a tea which was just depressing –tea is for after midday if you ask me- I decided on a hot chocolate…. I know it’s not particularly diet food and no it isn’t one of those gods awful ‘options’ its twinning’s hot chocolate mixed with milk.

In my defence I really don’t fancy cereal this morning, if I’m truthful I didn’t yesterday either despite eating a bowl of porridge bigger than daddy bear’s. So anyway I don’t really like hot chocolate to me it’s always been one of those forbidden things like most drinks with a calorific value over zero.

I suppose when I say I don’t like it, I mean it’s always over rated in my mind and never lives up to  my expectations. This morning however I want anything that will take my mind of not having coffee. And of course I am still drinking it; I find with hot chocolate there is an optimum temperature to drink it at.

There have been so many things I have avoided over the years, milkshakes, smoothies, yogurt drinks. In my mind they are all unnecessary calories when you are trying to diet. Especially when you can put the calories to better use.  I’ve realised now though that isn’t the answer, life should be a varied experience of different tastes and textures. And nothing should be off limits.

Take today for example just because I have had a hot chocolate it shouldn’t then be a downward spiral of eating and self-loathing. I should enjoy the fact I just had a nice hot chocolate but it isn’t going to stop me making healthy choices the rest of the day.

Hang on nope I don’t mean that… by saying healthy choices you again are cutting down 75% of your food options for the day. What I meant was it doesn’t mean I have to blow today out of the ocean and eat everything in my wake.

When it really comes down to it fat people are fat because they eat too much!  However the overeating starts – o fill a void, depression, anxiety- any reason you can think of.  Eventually that goes to the wayside and we continue to over eat because our body has got used to having a plentiful supply of fuel and when we stop that it feels like its imploding.

Seriously I can have a plate of pasta and garlic bread followed by dessert and still is hungry less than an hour later.  I don’t understand how that is possible, so how can others. Sure a scientist might be able to come in and explain some of the physiology behind it, or even a psychologist might come and explain the psychological reasons. At the end of the day though armed with the physiology and psychology isn’t going to stop me eating the bar of chocolate. My body says I’m hungry so dang it I must be hungry!

What we need to do is get in control of our bodies and I’m not talking hypnotherapy.  I’m saying we need to listen to what our body wants for real and what it’s just trying to kid us into eating.  Once we recognise where we are doing the most damage.

A few weeks ago me and Steve had a ready meal each, it looked tiny as I was dishing it up, and I think it was chicken and rice. This was in the midst of an especially good patch, but still the meal looked tiny and I was convinced it wouldn’t be enough for me. I was looking longingly at Steve’s wondering if he was really hungry.

Anyway I had the meal followed by a yogurt and guess what it was enough. I didn’t feel hungry after and went to bed feeling pretty smug with myself. This wasn’t some fluke this was a few weeks of me cutting down and saying no to myself. That led to a point where a smaller meal was enough.

Somewhere though my overeating creeps back up, and I really believe it when I start to over analyse everything I am eating trying to get the quickest results or when I feel that because I had a slice a cake one day and someone commented on it. I feel I have done wrong. When really had been eating cake all along and still lost weight

Sure people want to be helpful and I’m not blaming them for my overeating but what people don’t realise is you are always one mouthful away from blowing your diet so to speak. And it’s actually a horrible feeling knowing what you are doing is ruining all the hard work you have already put in.

So my message is this… don’t conform, don’t listen to people who tell you how so and so lost weight. You do it your way, cut down where you want to and realise your danger spots where you just can’t say no. mine is chocolate there is no limit to the amount of chocolate I can eat. This is why I try to avoid it and replace my sweet treats with cakes or biscuits.

With those I can have an average portion and enjoy it, Knowing I’m not about to trigger a barrage of craving receptors. I also know I can make it a part of my dieting day and still lose weight if I don’t snack between meals or eat after dinner.