That throw me off course, when I say small I mean it in the small clothes sense. Argh so when I lost the stone -I have since put back on-, my clothes were way too big and baggy and some of my smaller wardrobe started fitting me.

It was a great feeling, but now I have put the stone back on I can honestly say I hate those clothes. They are uncomfortable don’t sit right and yes I am paranoid of them splitting. It’s got to the point where I take a spare pair of trousers out with me.

And since I threw all my bigger ones out, which quite frankly should of probably gone months ago. I am very limited on my clothing options. Ironically the only thing’s that do fit me comfortably is my fuller fillies’ jodhpurs. And as much as I would like to I can’t live in them indefinitely.

I know your probably thinking why don’t I just lose the stone again believe me I am trying I’m just not sure how I did it. All I know is It was hard but not so hard that I wasn’t eating some of the foods I like because it was before Christmas and remember thinking hey I don’t feel like I’m missing out! Since then though it’s been a whole other story.

So yesterday despite my post I couldn’t help let the negativity in esp. when I realised the top I was wearing was too short. And I had a general feeling of un-comfortableness about me.  So rather than sit here being miserable I decided to do something about it. And what does a girl do when her tops are too small.

She shops, now although I enjoy shopping I’ve never been a big clothes shopper though I think the whole bad experience of trying something on only to realise you’ve gone up another size is depressing. Oh and let’s not forget the era in the early 80’s when there were no real big shops (well not near me at least).

So I managed to get some T-shirts from ‘Yours’ –formerly ‘size up’, which I preferred-  I’m so glad I got them what a difference it makes waking up knowing  I have some tops that fit me.  And they have finally got rid of that awful scoop neck thing they had going on. They are nothing fancy but have a good v neck.

So yesterday was a bit of a wash out and despite what I said I couldn’t help beating myself up about the stone I’ve put back on or stop the thoughts of ‘I want this weight of as quick as possible’  I even had flash thoughts of joining a diet club or starving myself!

I’m glad to say though all those thoughts are gone this morning and despite wanting the weight off quick, I am going to stick by what  said yesterday. 3 small meals with 1 afternoon snack. I’m also trying to add more fruit into all our diets.