So as much as I got so fed up with being a complete nightmare when it comes to sticking to any kind of plan, and then having the excuse of not being able to start again because I was going out for the day and it would just be wrong to try and stick to some regimented calorie intake. Or trying to stick to a set routine each day and limiting my options.

I also got thoroughly fed up with feeling like crap for over eating and not doing as much exercise as I use to. I equally got fed up with food and wanting all of it and then actually wanting any of it. Seriously I do get some big cravings and enjoy most of them. But then there are others where I just think for god sake why did you eat that.

The number of meals I’ve picked at because I have filled up on sandwiches. I’m not one for the whole 3 meals a day thing. But the one meal I don’t like to miss is dinner and it doesn’t matter if I’m hungry or not. It just doesn’t feel right if I don’t have dinner. Now I have got better at this because before it would of had to of been a proper cooked meal, whereas now I can justify something more snacky like a sandwich or even a bowl of cereal.

So in order to try and get some semblance of control back in my life I decided enough is enough. I’m not a planner, I don’t like rules and I never EVER stick to a plan mine or anyone else’s. the fact I don’t have a 9-5 job means I never know what I am doing from one day to the next. I also don’t know if I’m going to be truly hungry at 7am or 2pm. I also don’t know if I’ll be at home with little nice in the house to eat. Or out in an exquisite cake shop. So why should I miss out on those moments.

I shouldn’t and over the last three days I haven’t. I’ve eaten pretty much what I’ve fancied or has been on offer. I’ve eaten sensibly knowing that a hog roast roll for £6 won’t fill me up, but a beef and veg pie for £9 will. Equally I have chosen to have a chocolate filled crepe over a piece of fruit. I’m in control I’m making the choices and when I can’t have what I had planned on its not the end of the world I’m not comparing calorie or fat values. In the past i have put so much pressure on food that it becomes unenjoyable (ok it’s a rare occurrence, but it has happened).

So wanna know what I have been doing for last 3 days that has kept my spirits up and also made the scales go down by 3lbs. It’s no big revelation I’m afraid but for me it is a big deal. I said to myself I could eat four times in the day and I spread it out where I have lunch, a snack, a main meal and a dessert. Or I’ve clumped it together and had 3 in 1. Either way I’m not being too greedy I know when enough is enough or when I haven’t had enough.

I also pushed myself the last few days I’ve walked further and pushed myself through those painful moments. Ok it might of been in the shopping village at the Horse of the year show, our seats were up in the rafters as well and I pushed myself up them a little bit. And yesterday was a family day out to the dinosaur park, yes there are hills in Norfolk! I can honestly say the last three days despite only 3hours sleep have been the calmest I’ve had in a few months.