It came to me this morning as I went to get on the scales…Does it really matter where I begin, surely it’s the ‘end’ that’s important, in the past I have focused so much on the… what & where I start. It almost consumes me and then when I fail I feel lost. Sure I think wouldn’t it be great to lose so much. But that seems such a long way off I can’t really commit myself.

I know I said I was going to use Chinese New Year as my starting point for getting back on the wagon. what I didn’t factor on was it being two days away from shrove Tuesday. And after the weekend i’ve had I ended up making some rooky dieter mistakes, One was on Sunday – supposedly my last day, and a day out with the boy- I had planned to eat what I wanted.

Only problem was there really wasn’t much opportunity to eat nice yummy foods. In fact it was quite a sparse day, after driving home in strong winds and snow blizzards I crashed in front of the tv with the last of the chocolate biscuits, I felt cheated of my last day of food freedom. I then realised it was only a day away from lent. So I put all my focus into giving up chocolate. And of course that meant I could eat what I liked for a couple more days.

I then went too far the other way and had too many nice things to eat in the house, which I filled myself up on and not only could I not finish them I also filled up too much to eat any real food. Which meant this morning I woke up absolutely starving. My tummy was making scrunching sounds at me this morning. Feast or famine really is the no1 issue for most dieters. We don’t know that in between stage.

So starting today I am giving up chocolate bars and confectionary for lent. I’m not giving up chocolate cakes or desserts. In the past I have made the mistake of saying I am giving up chocolate and then it has caused more issues and again I get so focused on the fact I can’t have chocolate when I am confronted by something with a sprinkle of chocolate it sends me into overdrive and I am more liable to fail.

Whereas we all know my weakness and reason I am overweight is the chocolate bar itself. I think if I try to pinpoint it I will have more chance of success.

Oh and snazzles (touch wood) is looking pretty sound. He’s been off the pain killers since Sunday and is walking out fine. I will give it until after the weekend and maybe then I will try bringing him back into work.