So this might not sound like a big deal to some but for me… It’s not much short of a miracle….

On Sunday I ate an Easter egg, it was a Cadburys caramel egg. Noo not a little individual one I actually had  2 of those and one big chocolate egg. (I enjoyed every mouthful) oh and so I didn’t have to share it with my son, I let him have his large kinder one early.

Now for the miracle… Yesterday I didn’t crave chocolate!!!! (Really don’t think I could fit enough exclamation marks on this post, to express my surprise/shock/delight lol). Ok so I made a banana loaf and did have a fair bit of that and peanut butter on toast for lunch. Not once though did I think I want chocolate, or worse case I need chocolate. I even knew Hubby would have been able to pick me some up but I didn’t ask him to.

Now normally when I go of the rails even in what I consider a controlled way, it’s often not long after that a have a full blown pig out. This is usually more so after I have eaten chocolate… There are two things in this world that seem to trigger me into wanting more… McDonalds and chocolate. Usually when I do have the junk chocolate (Cadburys, galaxy, mars) it takes me a good few days of pigging out on the stuff to get back on track enough to start cutting it out again. That is why I often try the posh chocolates, if I’m honest though I don’t really like them all that much.

I don’t know if this mind-set will last, I hope it does. Because Friday I had a little moment of despair. I rode NAS again Friday- I know I said i would go more into this, and believe me i want to. It’s just i also wanted to add more on the information i have gathered over the years about weight carrying abilities of horses, in fact eventually I’m hoping this blog will be more about horses than diets, I will get around to doing it asap- Back to Friday, I’m trying to think what I had for lunch that day, ah yes I had a baguette with cheese and pickle.

So i had been kind of good, rode NAS, walked the dogs etc. And was on my way to pick Horatio up from nursery. I’m not sure what came over me but I had this massive urge to go and buy chocolate I really wanted to pig out on the stuff in a big way. This isn’t helped by the fact i have to drive past the village shop either. I just thought to myself this is ridiculous, you’ve ridden NAS today which is what you say you want more than anything and now you’re thinking of blowing your diet again on chocolate, plus it’s not as if you’ve really missed out this week.

It got me to thinking at what point am I going to be in control enough not to be looking for an excuse to have a pig out. When am I going to be able to have one chocolate bar and that either be

 A, enough to satisfy my cravings.

B, not send my mind into overdrive thinking I’ve ruined my diet I might as well have more.

Yesterday I had another kind of break through… I listened to my body, all day I felt a bit bloated. There were points when I felt hungry and I ate a little more than usual, this is what happens when in the house with 4yr old that doesn’t shut up. Anyhow in the morning I ate a little bit earlier than usual, and I also had quite a big chunk of banana loaf.

THIS PART IS A BIG DEAL… Now I am an eater I could eat for England, sometimes I think there is no limit to the amount I can consume… But yesterday i got to the point where my body just said ‘thanks but no thanks’ I had had enough. Even when I was bored watching the same episode of Garfield for the third time, I didn’t want food. Even when i was trying to avoid doing more listing on eBay, I didn’t want food. EVEN when I was getting stressed about our finances, I didn’t want food.

Now tell me miracles don’t exist….

All last week I had 2meals and a proper dessert every night. Oh and at lunchtimes I got into the habit of having something nice as well. Not chocolate, but a piece of cake, one day I had two doughnuts and on another I had two pecan Danish’s… Ok some nights after dinner I might of just had a yogurt but on others it was cake and ice cream or a choc ice. Now for the biggest shocker last week I lost 5lbs yep I am now down to 22st 9lbs this morning.